I've been thinking a lot lately. I mean. I think a lot every single day.
Especially at nights. Those minutes when I'm alone, there's only me and my pillow.
And I think about everything, anything. I questioned myself about a lot of things.
And sometimes, I can't even find the answer for the questions.
The room is so silent, but my mind is so loud. I think about things that I never want to think about.
And I hate myself for bringing back those memories, for thinking about those things.
I regret things I didn't do when I had the chance to do it.
I think about the wrongdoings I did in the past and it made me feel bad about myself.
I constantly asked myself why in the hell was I so stupid back then?
There are also good memories of course, and those flashback about them which I really wish it'll happen again or repeatedly. I really miss the people who are now just some strangers in my life.
And sometimes tears streaming down my face because I'm not sure if the people who are still standing by my side right now, will still be standing still with me in the future, especially during hard times. It's not impossible that one fine day, they might be just some strangers too to me in the future.
The past is a really nice place to visit, but not a good place to stay.
I realize I have to keep going with my life. No, I will never forget my past. But I'll just deal with it and learn from it. I learn to forgive myself and others. I'm gonna live my life to the fullest.
And remind myself that everything will be okay.
In life, we can always find a way to solve our problem. No matter how hard it is to figure it out.
If you said you have no clue how to solve it even though you've tried many times,
well maybe you didn't try your hardest.
So, we just need to keep trying. Don't ever for a second thought about giving up your life.
Xx
Especially at nights. Those minutes when I'm alone, there's only me and my pillow.
And I think about everything, anything. I questioned myself about a lot of things.
And sometimes, I can't even find the answer for the questions.
The room is so silent, but my mind is so loud. I think about things that I never want to think about.
And I hate myself for bringing back those memories, for thinking about those things.
I regret things I didn't do when I had the chance to do it.
I think about the wrongdoings I did in the past and it made me feel bad about myself.
I constantly asked myself why in the hell was I so stupid back then?
There are also good memories of course, and those flashback about them which I really wish it'll happen again or repeatedly. I really miss the people who are now just some strangers in my life.
And sometimes tears streaming down my face because I'm not sure if the people who are still standing by my side right now, will still be standing still with me in the future, especially during hard times. It's not impossible that one fine day, they might be just some strangers too to me in the future.
The past is a really nice place to visit, but not a good place to stay.
I realize I have to keep going with my life. No, I will never forget my past. But I'll just deal with it and learn from it. I learn to forgive myself and others. I'm gonna live my life to the fullest.
And remind myself that everything will be okay.
In life, we can always find a way to solve our problem. No matter how hard it is to figure it out.
If you said you have no clue how to solve it even though you've tried many times,
well maybe you didn't try your hardest.
So, we just need to keep trying. Don't ever for a second thought about giving up your life.
Xx
